The Facts of Life

Talking to your children will help them make the right choices later

Many parents feel uncomfortable talking to their children about sex. And young people often don't like talking to their parents about the subject. Children of all ages will ask questions about sex. It is important to help young people make good decisions about this subject.

Start talking to your children about sex when they are young. Talk about sex will then become as natural as talking about music, sports and movies. In fact, music, movies and the Internet can influence young people's ideas about sex.

When parents and children have a good relationship and can talk to each other, the children are likely to wait longer before having sex. They're also more likely to use the right methods of birth control. The more a young person knows about sex, the less likely he or she is to have sex.

Some children start asking questions about sex when they are two years old. Others don't ask questions until they are older. Don't feel that you have to give your toddler a complete description, but your answers should not include the stork or other myths. If your child finds out you've lied about sex, the questions will probably stop.

Children will ask different questions at different ages. Let the young person decide what to ask, but share information you think is important.

What if you don't know the answer to a question your child asks? Say, "I don't know but I will find out". Then find out the answer and tell your child. You may be able to get the answer from a book, a doctor or a nurse.

What if the child asks a question about sex at the wrong time or in the wrong place? This may happen, for example, at the supper table when you have company. Give a short answer and say, "We can talk more about it later."

Let your child know you are willing to answer any question he or she asks. This doesn't mean you have to agree with everything your child says or does. By all means let your child know what you believe. As a parent, you have a duty to share ideas about sex and other issues with your son or daughter.