Similarly, Natalie was living a tumultuous life of domestic violence, but eventually chose to end the relationship. She then escaped to a safer environment with her two young children. By accessing her own voice, she was trying to gain the power she had been denied, along with some formal education and her own income. These are all things she had been deprived while living in her abusive relationship with her husband.

Unwritten Rules

As discussed in the previous chapter, homework and supporting school activities tend to be gendered tasks. Regardless of the family composition, these activities are typically in the mother's domain. Unfortunately, as Nagle (1999) points out, many of these women do not know how to access what they need from the schools to help them perform these tasks as effectively as they can with their children. Consequently, they become confused and frustrated by the unwritten rules of conduct and they may end up feeling helpless when silenced by the teachers.

Jill recognizes that her son was having problems with his schoolwork. When she goes to school to meet with the teacher, she does not make an appointment but shows up in the middle of the morning when the teacher is engaged in teaching the class. Jill becomes frustrated when the teacher does not stop teaching to see what she wants at the door and so Jill leaves, feeling like the teacher had no interest in her son. Clearly, Jill does not understand that she should arrange a mutually convenient time to meet with the teacher to allow the time needed to discuss her son's needs and concerns that she might have.