Too late, I find out there is The Unwritten Eleventh Commandment: Thou shalt not have an higher education than thy abusive spouse. The quadratic equation, in a no-win situation, is: "No more fucking algebra you stupid woman; do the fucking dishes and then come to bed now." (Think about it; I cannot Do, Then, and still come to bed Now. So I'll opt to do the dishes, and he'll screw me at the sink.) This formula is also known as "curricula interruptus" and is known to be a 100% effective method of control. Finally, yes, he taught 1 me anger. My anger. I petitioned for divorce in 1989.

Too late, I find out The Unwritten Eleventh Commandment: Thou shall not have an higher education than thy abusive spouse.

Three years of intense therapy later, I can say I have successfully been through the following: a sixteen week course on domestic abuse (Breathe Colleen); an eight week course on childhood sexual abuse (breathe) and incest (keep breathing); a sixteen week course on self-defense (Stay present; how do you feel?) an eight week course on first-aid (Have I eaten today? Have I slept this week? What do I need right now?); and I am enrolled in a lifelong course on the healing process (Take your time; take off the veils). I write freely in the safety of a pen name. I can also say, with unveiled pride and a measure of joy, that at the age of thirty, upon almost half a lifetime of leaving high school: I completed the I correspondence courses, and I hold my Grade Twelve Diploma.

Now, I am beginning to learn ...

Colleen N. Race is a pseudonym; all names and places have been omitted to protect her identity. Colleen is a published freelance writer, and is the single mother of one child. She is presently continuing her education at the post-secondary level (by correspondence courses, of course) toward a third career in the library field.