Coping with stress

Clearly, symptoms of stress that do not abate need to be addressed. The next question is how? If you identified one or more stressors on the previous page, it's time to plan a strategy to eliminate or accept them.

For each source of stress, ask yourself the following two key questions.

1. How important is this issue to me?
2. How much control do I have over the issue?

Using the matrix on the next page, place each of your stressors in one of the following four quadrants.

1. Uncontrollable-Unimportant — Whatever you identify in this quadrant is neither important nor controllable. Therefore, you should not be spending much time or energy worrying about these issues.
2. Controllable-Unimportant — Issues or stressors that fall into this category should not receive too much time and energy because you have identified that they are not important. However, because they are controllable, you can effect some kind of change.
3. Uncontrollable-Important — These stressors are often the most frustrating because they appear not to be controllable. The first thing to do is ask yourself "Am I sure that I have no control over this issue?" If one or more remain uncontrollable, you will need to spend some time identifying strategies for coping with the stress.
4. Controllable-Important — These issues are the ones that should demand the most of your time and energy. Because they are controllable, acceptance is not necessarily the method of coping. For these you will want to develop your action plan.