creating a better learning environment

Reclaiming My Life

I often wonder whether I learned more from the courses I studied in university or from the hours I spent in counselling provided by the Student Counselling Services. After years of unsuccessfully attempting to enlist help in dealing with the fall-out of abuse inflicted on me in my teen-age years, I finally sank into a deep depression.

I was in my second year of a Bachelor of Arts degree and did not care whether I lived or died, much less how well I did in my courses. The pain of my daily existence had become almost unbearable and I was tempted to succumb to utter and total hopelessness. Somehow, I managed to find within myself just enough courage, hope and strength to make one last effort to save myself. I contacted a psychologist at the Student Counselling Centre and found my story and pain taken seriously for the very first time.

Simply being heard renewed my will to live and revived my determination to reclaim my life from the nightmare my abusers had set in motion. The process was seldom easy, often it was excruciatingly painful, but it was also tremendously satisfying and sometimes even joyful.

I was frightened, but also pleased and grateful to find that I was expected to define the parameters and the goals of my counselling process. I felt that I was being shown respect as a whole person and that a safe place had been created for me to explore my hurts and my healing.

In the years that followed, I did not always choose to be actively involved in the counselling process, but I found that these sessions provided me with techniques and processes that have become invaluable tools in my life-long quest for healing and growth. They also gave me the freedom to explore my newly discovered insights--knowing help was readily available if I found myself out of my depth, the ability to recognize when I needed to return for professional help and the discernment to choose psychologists and counsellors who would be most helpful to me. Most importantly, I gained an intimate knowledge and respect for my pain. Gradually, it became transformed from an enemy to an ally in my efforts to become more fully alive.

These gains would not have been possible without a tremendous effort on my part and a huge investment of emotional energy. Consequently, I was not always able to devote my full attention to my academic pursuits. My counsellors were extremely helpful not only in assisting me to assess my priorities and set realistic academic goals, but they also helped me navigate through the university's administrative rules and regulations. Acting as a liaison between me, my professors and various administrative departments, they were able to tailor an academic program and timetable that was much more responsive to my individual emotional needs.