Before
and After
Greater
Vancouver
Municipal
Bylaw

After taking a clear language course, Rick Novosel, a Park Operator with Greater Vancouver Regional District Parks and Greenways, became a plain language champion. When the opportunity came up to rewrite a parks bylaw in plain language, he was ready for the challenge.

Rick did the first drafts and then called on the assistance of Christine Mowat of Wordsmith Associates Communications Consultants Ltd. Here is a selection from the old bylaw and the new draft version.Footnote 2

Before

10. COMMERCIAL SERVICES, ACTIVITIES OR DEMONSTRATIONS

  1. No person shall sell, exchange or barter or expose or display for sale, any goods, materials or services whatsoever, including but not limited to food and refreshments, nor shall any person conduct any business or commercial activity in a Regional Park or a Regional Trail unless that person has the prior express written authorization of the Parks Manager or a valid Park Permit.
  2. No person shall post, affix, deliver, paint, publish or distribute any notice, advertisement, sign, placard or hand-bill or any kind whatsoever in a Regional Park or Regional Trail unless that person has the prior express written authorization of the Parks Manager or a valid Park Permit.
  3. No person shall operate or station any Commercial Vehicle or any Motor Vehicle displaying advertising or equipped with a public address system in a Regional Park or a Regional Trail for the purpose of advertising, promoting, demonstrating or attracting attention unless that person has the prior express written authorization of the Parks Manager or a valid Park Permit.

After

13. Commercial Services, Activities, or Demonstrations

a. Unless he or she has the Parks Manager’s written authorization or a valid park permit allowing the activity, a person in a regional park must not

  1. Sell, barter, or display for sale any goods, services, or materials, including food and refreshments.
  2. Conduct any business or commercial activity, whether paid for in advance of, during, or following the activity.
  3. Post, deliver, paint, publish, or distribute any notice, advertisement, sign, placard, or handbill of any kind.
  4. Operate or station any commercial vehicle or any motor vehicle displaying advertising or equipped with a public address system for the purpose of advertising, promoting, demonstrating, or attracting attention.

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Return to note 2 Please note that, at the time of printing the Clarity Kit, the new bylaw had not yet been approved. The example is included to demonstrate how legal language can be simplified.